Make Your Children Your Number One Priority in a Divorce
Although the number fluctuates a bit from year to year, there is still a 50 percent chance that anyone getting married today will end up in divorce court. And although recent research for 2009 shows that the current rate may be dropping just a little, most likely because of the economy, a couple tying the knot today still has a one in two chance of the marriage failing. That is not a very optimistic way to start a new life together. The couple may differ; but the reasons for most of the break-ups do not vary much- they remain to be finance, sex, infidelity and the never-ending list of ‘irreconcilable differences” , which includes-if you do not find any thing else – just boredom!
When a marriage breaks up, it is a very stressful time for both partners, but the biggest losers in any split are the children. If young ones are part of the situation, the number one concern is for the young ones and making sure they can deal with the situation. If a divorce is inevitable with a husband and wife, even after trying to work things out, they should make sure that they promise each other to always put their children first. Children will pick up when tension exists, since they are perceptive, however they will also tend to think that they are to blame for the problems of their parents. It is possible for children to go through a wide range of feelings, such as guilt, grief, sadness, isolation, anger and depression as well as experiencing the fear that they will be abandoned by one or both parents.
So how do you help children adjust and provide reassurance during this stressful time? Let it not be a secret and let them know that what is happening is not their mistake. It is imperative that they are comfortable while feeling safe and protected and that their feelings are normal, this can be acheived through verbal and non-verbal communication. Ultimately things will become alright though there are some changes and this point should sink in them Let them know you care about them and spend plenty of time with them, even just watching TV and giving hugs.
You also need to let them express themselves and their sadness or confusion. Some kid can’t express and not able to talk about their feelings but if we encourage them into games and programs then they can find the words to express their feelings. Drawing, arts and crafts, sports, dance, music and creative writing can all help children transfer their innermost thoughts into a different medium. There may be advantages to the children receiving counseling also.
Keep as much stability and routine in their lives as you possibly can. Even though daddy or mommy may be moving out, you should have regular contacts with them. For example, every Thursday night can be pizza night with the kids. {This will give them something to look forward to and count on.} Once daddy starts helping in math homework, it should continue even through phone and web connection.
Divorce sometimes brings out the worst in people. Don’t allow this to occur with you and your partner, particularly if you have kids. Although there may have been egregious transgressions on the part of one spouse, avoid playing the blame game, especially in front of the children. You are both parents first and your first responsibility is to protect them from the fallout from your failed relationship.
Finally, the most important thing to remember – and you can’t stress it often enough – is to reassure your children that they are loved! They have to be assured that they are still loved by their parents even after the separation. In order to have an amicable divorce the couple should give their children all of the love they once had for each other.
If divorce is a subject you’re interested in, you can read more about my experience as an experienced family law attorney in Austin. You can also request our Austin Texas Divorce Guide CD at TruslerLegal.com. If you need more specific information, you can review our questions about divorce in Austin TX.
Sunday School Crafts: Shopping for Kids Craft Supplies
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Wilton 2104-6667 12 Piece Cupcake Decorating Set $4.57 Create all kinds of fun cupcake designs perfect for celebrations or everyday treats! Includes star tips 1M (rosettes, stars, and drop flowers), star tip 22 (zigzags, pull-out stars), round tip 12 (outlines, dots, messages), and Bismarck tip 230 for exciting filled cupcakes, plus 8 disposable bags, and an instruction booklet. 12 pieces total! Made in USA/Imported…. |
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Melissa & Doug Shape, Model and Mold $11.13 The Melissa and Doug Shape, Model, and Mold Kit includes everything your little one needs to create fun, clay creations! Offering hours of imaginative fun, each kit includes 4 tubs of modeling dough, molded lids, a patterned wheel press, 5 wooden stamping cubes, and 3 patterned rolling pins. Children will have a blast rolling, cutting, pressing, and shaping their way to fun!… |
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Wilton Chocolate Pro Electric Melting Pot $23.17 WILTON-The Chocolate Pro Melting Pot. It’s easier than ever to melt large amounts of chocolate or confectionery coating! With the Chocolate Pro it takes only minutes! With this you will be able to mold lollipops and fancy dipped-center candies. Dip things like fruits; pretzels; cake; and so much more! Create flavored chocolate sauces for ice cream or silky ganache glaze to pour over cakes. Feature… |
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Blue’s Clues – Blue’s Big Musical Movie $4.71 Join Steve, Blue and all their friends as they plan a backyard musical show! Preschoolers will help Steve and Blue get the show underway, write an all new song with G-Clef –the voice of Ray Charles, and of course, play Blue’s Clues. In Blue’s Big Musical Movie, preschoolers will sing, dance, play, and learn that they can be anything they want to be! Includes 6 Brand-New Songs!Promotes: Critical T… |
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Blue’s Clues – Shapes And Colors $4.26 Standard; Soundtrack: English Dolby Digital stereo…. |
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Pretty. Odd. $3.22 The title gives it away instantly- Pretty.Odd. (don’t forget the periods) is not exactly the album that affirmed admirers of Panic At The Disco will have expected. The quartet, then teenagers, hit big in 2005 when A Fever You Can’t Sweat Out rode its hit single “I Write Sins Not Tragedies” and its striking video to huge sales, defining their niche bridging emo and theatrical art-rock. Three years … |
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RoomMates RMK1470SCS Disney Princess Peel & Stick Wall Decals with Gems $9.24 … |
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ClosetMaid 8697 Fabric Drawer, Natural $5.99 “LOSETMAID” FABRIC DRAWER NATURAL Natural Closetmaid |
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No-Burn Fabric Fire Gard Spray, 32-Ounce $17.99 Help protect your interior upholstered furnishings and fabrics from accidental fire with the No-Burn Fabric Fire Gard. This safe, effective, and easy-to-use formula helps prevent items like curtains, furnishings, upholstery, and more from ignition and the spread of fire. Applying Fabric Fire Gard to interior upholstered furnishings and fabrics provides peace of mind, by helping to prevent a small … |
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Fashion Angels Lap Desk $14.20 This trendy lap desk is perfectly portable, giving you a work surface any place you feel the need to be creative. It’s great for in your room or for fun on the go. This is a great item for students and great for use with laptop computers. It features a hard writing surface with a cup to hold your drink, markers or a snack. The smooth surface makes for easy cleaning. The fun fashion print fabric of… |